Stephen Hard, Minimonk

Stephen Hard is a quintessential Jack of all trades, master of none. Friends dispute that I am not a master of anything, but I know what I do not know. I may know a lot, but what I know in any given realm is a great deal less than the real experts in any of these areas. There is now a term for people like me: generalist. I have come to appreciate the value of knowing a little about a lot of things, especially when trying to fathom God and delve into human spirituality. 

It was in my first year at the University of Scranton studying philosophy that I took my first step toward wisdom. It was Socrates who said that the wise man knows what he does not know. The study of theology at Saint Charles Seminary in Philadelphia advanced my knowledge of God, but taught me nothing more important than that we cannot know God fully. I was applying the Socratic perspective to God. Serving as a Roman Catholic priest in the Diocese of Allentown, Pennsylvania, I found God already living in his people to be much more impressive than my efforts to bring him to them. Then there was 7 years in a Carthusian monastery, the most conservative major religious order within the Catholic Church. Ironically, my vision of God was liberalized. As I got to know God better God just wouldn’t fit in my boxes, or even the Church’s. I left the priesthood and, at the same time, “came out” as a gay man. For me that meant dating with the purpose of finding a spouse even though in 1994 neither the Church nor the State would understand it that way. Mark Giulietti and I were married on the day after Christmas, 1997, in a Catholic Church with a nuptial mass that included the renewal of our baptismal promises. It was private and in secret, of course. My next phase was the study of psychology. My first inclination was to become a therapist. Subsequently, I developed an interest in social psychology, especially human motivation, and obtained a Master of Arts from Central Connecticut State University. I worked for a short time doing sexual assault educational programming (I served as a volunteer sexual assault crisis counselor for over 10 years). I then began a career in arts administration, a position I have held for over 12 years. Today I also teach psychology part time at Central Connecticut State University. Most important of all, I struggle to remain faithful to God in the circumstances of my life. Perhaps I can help you do the same.